kate who is eighteen and wishes she was a flying cat with laser eyes

  • married to Simon Amstell
  • I have placed a hit on Jesse Eisenberg through several mafias and yakuza clans yet somehow he continues to exist and so while he lives on my life continues to atrophy in indirect proportion
  • there are 0 reasons to follow me
  • in fact there are anti-reasons

  • December 25th
    12:00 AM

    this is about me missing my best friend in the whole wide world named KIMMY

    • kimmy is perfect and wonderful
    • she is a saint
    • except also she is a bitch
    • like me
    • we hate the same people
    • we love the same people
    • we are the same type of weird
    • we have the same type of humor
    • WE BOTH NEEEEEEEEED 6 EEEEEEGGS
    • we have the same soul
    • we’re like brothers… only closer
    • once we took 2c-e together and amongst other weird things we wrote a story about top being an anteater and eating everyong
    • as in this top
    • I don’t know either
    • we have just made a lot of dumb stuff together
    • we have made terrible jello shots that were terrible
    • we went to ihop
    • all
    • the
    • goddamn
    • time
    • we skipped class to eat at ihop, even
    • WE WERE SERIOUS ABOUT IHOP
    • and similarly we can somehow be serious together
    • we get into shit together
    • we get out of shit together
    • we somehow bullshat our way through apush together
    • we have too many inside jokes to count
    • like
    • i don’t even know what they are anymore
    • but in the middle of the night I will remember one and start crying myself to sleep
    • from laughter i mean
    • also we do fun things in michael’s craft stores
    • like have obscure animal fights
    • and wear boas and get feathers everywhere 
    • and then leave without buying anything
    • just
    • the fact that she now lives on the other side of the world makes my heart cry
    • like
    • ugh
    • i miss her
    • I LOVE YOU, MY SISTER, MY WIFE, MY HONEY BEE
    • WE NEED TO TEXT MORE OFTEN
    • LEARN TO TEXT IN OUR SLEEP
    • <3
    • <333333
    • the end
    • ps: kimmy+kate=~*~*4EVR*~*~